Wandering around in a fog

After consulting with the physician and nurses, the family decided to discontinue meds and mechanical life support of Dad. He wasn't making any improvement since being admitted, and as time passed, his chances of getting better were diminishing. My main concern was that he be in as little pain as possible and that we should not prolong his suffering needlessly. We all took our turns to say our goodbyes. I was feeling so many different emotions, but mostly, I was numb with shock.

Sometime before 4:30 pm, the nurses started "the process" of giving him morphine and taking him off the IVs and ventilator. His heart continued beating faintly and irregularly for about an hour, then his breathing completely stopped.

I think he was ready to go. His friends noticed that he was a little down during the last couple of weeks. His angiogram did not have great news and it was clear that he needed to have bypass surgery. He was likely thinking about how much he could tolerate the surgery itself and whether he was going to be really out of the danger zone afterwards. Little things he said lately made me think that he was preparing us for what might happen.

It's been good for the family to distract ourselves from the grief and focus the arrangements for the funeral service. I'm going to say a few things and get some help from a friend to work up a segment in formal Chinese (similar to what I did for my mom two and a half years ago).

It's going to be challenging to summarize this remarkable man's life. He was a hardworking entrepreneur who lived and pursued his dreams with intensity.

Life Passages: Another door to enter

Checking in to say hi to my dear friends in the cyber-shala. I know it's been a while since I last posted, but forgive me for this brief update.

Had to rush over to Vancouver yesterday. My Dad, with his heart problems, had a major attack and suffered some serious damage. The paramedics arrived promptly, but there were prolonged attempts at resuscitation before getting him to the hospital. His vitals are stabilized with lots of medical support, but since his admission there are no real improvements to his condition.

I'm going over to the hospital now. The whole family is in town, and we'll have a meeting with the interventionist this afternoon. We'll have some tough decisions to make. I'll be okay, but I do worry for my eldest sister, who's been having the hardest time dealing with all of this.

Dad, we'll try to do the right thing for you.